How to spot a BEAUTY BLOGGER?

I've got a very light-hearted post for you. In fact it's a guest post in translation - originally written by lovely TRB from Day is Beautiful. Since it's a Czech blog, and I really thought that the post was worth sharing, TRB kindly let me make it a guest post if I translate it, yay! So sit back and enjoy, beauty bloggers - do you know how to spot a BEAUTY BLOGGER

She's got strange stains of various colours & textures on her hands (or other body parts). That's because she constantly keeps testing all sorts of eye shadows, lipsticks and foundations on her hand/arm. Lip stains and tints are among the most long-lasting ones. No one has ever asked you why you've got a bruised hand? No? Well, then you obviously not a real beauty blogger.       

She's got a different eye shadow/mascara/eyeliner on each eye. Doh, a beauty blogger's obligation is to tell her readers what eye shadow/mascara/eyeliner has got longer staying power, which one doesn't smudge and which one goes better with blue eyes!

☑ She's got a different blush on each cheek. Because writing a collective blush comparison review is a hard and time consuming job, and what's the easiest way to compare two blushes in terms of colour, staying power and texture? Just use them at the same time!
☑ Her drawer is overflowing with lipsticks (at least 5 from each shade) and there are at least 5 foundations in her bathroom ready for testing. Because real beauty blogger doesn't use products up, she collects them and reviews them, and then carries on collecting and reviewing *cough-hoarder-cough*.

☑ She can tell apart at least 10 shades of red, 6 shades of black and 6 shades of white. And not only that she can tell them apart, she's also capable of typing up at least two paragraphs on each of them.

She's patiently waiting in her room for the sun to come up... just to stay in and take photographs for her blog. Why would she waste her time goin outside - she can just sit at home with window wide open and her collection of make-up in front of her, taking pictures whole day. And when the sun goes down, she can go out and show the whole world what she's been up to (see the first fact - the bruised hands).

☑ She can't use any of her new make-up products, unless they've been photographed. Because only photographs of a brand new lip gloss, blush, lipstick, powder or foundation are the right ones. Why, for God's sake, would she take a picture of a half used foundation?! *facepalm*

☑ When taking pictures of products, she obviously includes the packaging (including any box or other sort of outer packaging the product came in). For those purposes, she never throws any packaging away, but stores it in the corner of her room.

☑ Whilst purchasing new products, she's already thinking about what she's going to write about them.
☑ And sometimes, just sometimes she might buy a product just to review it, and not because she wants/needs it. C'mon, let's face it - every single of us has done it, at least once! 

 ☑ She knows more about products and their launches than sales assistants. And that can sometimes get really awkward. E.g. while browsing through the products at the NARS counter and looking for the new tinted moisturizer, then askin the shop assistant where it is, and the shop assistant has got no clue that NARS sells a tinted moisturizer (really?!).   

☑ Whilst reading other blogs she just nods and leaves comments such as: 'Yep, tried that too' or 'Yep, wearing that nail polish right now'. Beauty blogging is well-known for its community and loving support of all members. Nothing makes a beauty blogger happier than knowing that her most favourite blogger is using the same product like her.

☑ Her laptop contains a suspiciously large amount of photographs of herself. This does not necessarily proves her unbelievable vanity, but rather an attempt to show her readers the right hue of blush and where/how to apply it.

☑ Sometimes she only puts make-up on half of her face, and writes a post on her 'face of the day'. Why would you waste that expensive foundation/eye shadow/mascara when you can just take a picture from the right angle, right?!  

☑ She is very easily manipulated... by advertisement, PR's and hype reviews. And that's why all beauty bloggers buy, use and review the very same products at the very same time. 

☑ She always wants to be the first one to buy the most recently launched product. That's why you can see her strolling through Boots on a regular basis (usually at the same time every day while she's walking from work), as she's checking out whether the new collection is already available. She's the first one to be waiting in front of a store on the day of launch of a limited edition and she's the one who's askin shop assistants when the new Maybelline Color Tattoos will be stocked up.       

☑ She's online 24/7. That's the only way she can fully control her blog. In case she needs to sleep at night, she first brushes her teeth and then switches off her laptop. When she wakes up, the first thing she does is to press power-on and checks Blogger for new comments. 

☑ She does a lot of shopping. Because the more hauls, the bigger blogger you are - simples!

☑ Every month she's super excited about new Glossy Box. And ideally reviews it on the same day she received it.

☑ She will not miss 2 for 1 (3 for 2) offers in Boots. Never.

Thank you TRB for a brilliant post!
How many of these are you guilty of?

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